Bad Santa Quotes

Most Christmas movies are designed to be fun for the whole family. That wasn’t the case with Bad Santa. The best Bad Santa quotes prove that it’s a really raunchy movie. The film starring Billy Bob Thornton has turned into a cult hit, receiving a lot of airtime on cable channels over the years.

In this article, you’ll find a collection of the best Bad Santa quotes. From the hilarious to the profane, this list will hopefully have you quoting from the movie in no time. 

Bad Santa Quotes

Bad Santa Quotes

“Sketch it up, you fcking moron. Fcking Leonardo da Vinci.” – Marcus

“You need many years of therapy. Many, many, many, f*ckin’ years of therapy.” – Marcus

“Jesus, Mother Mary, and Joseph. You pissed yourself!” – Marcus

“I’m an eating, drinking, shitting, f*cking Santy Claus.” – Willie

“Jesus Christ! Can you maybe at least keep it together for just 10 minutes?” – Marcus

“You’re as queer as a ten-dollar bill.” – Hindustani Troublemaker

“More booze, more bullshit, more butt-f*cking.” – Marcus

“Are you off your f*cking meds or something?” – Willie

“The world ain’t fair. You’ve gotta take what you need when you can get it. You’ve gotta learn to stand up for yourself.” – Willie

“Before you do something stupid you might want to think about this shit.” – Willie

“Don’t take no shit from nobody, least of all, yourself.” – Willie

“Well they say he can get into anything. Anything. They say he’s been in Margaret Thatcher’s p*ssy.” – Willie

“I beat the shit out of some kids today. But it was for a purpose. It made me feel good about myself. It was like I did something constructive with my life or something. I don’t know. Like I accomplished something.” – Willie

“I’ve been to prison once, I’ve been married – twice. I was once drafted by Lyndon Johnson and had to live in shit-ass Mexico for 2 1/2 years for no reason. I’ve had my eye socket punched in, a kidney taken out and I got a bone-chip in my ankle that’s never gonna heal. I’ve seen some pretty shitty situations in my life, but nothing has ever sucked more ass than this!” – Willie

“Why don’t you wish in one hand, and shit in the other. See which one fills up first.” – Willie

“I said, “Next,” goddamn it! This is not the DMV!” – Willie

“Marcus, get this kid off me before he pisses on me, all right?” – Willie

“I’m on my f*cking lunch break, ok!” – Willie

“No, I’m an accountant. I wear this f*cking thing as a fashion statement, alright?” – Willie

“OW! Watch the toenails, kid. Shit!” – Willie

“Wanna see some magic? OK, let’s watch you disappear.” – Willie

“I don’t want any fcking sandwiches. What is it with you and fixin’ fcking sandwiches?” – Willie

“Whatcha my mom now? You shat me out of your womb?” – Willie

“I’ve always had a thing for Santa Claus. In case you didn’t notice. It’s like some deep-seated childhood thing.” – Sue

“That and everyone agreeing that the Phoenix police department shooting an unarmed Santa was even more fucked up than Rodney King”.

Conclusion

In conclusion, Santa is often quoted with inappropriate and unkind words. Although these quotes are often humorous, they can also be seen as offensive. It is important to remember that Santa is not a real person and should not be used as a role model for children. Instead, parents should use positive reinforcement to teach their kids the importance of Christmas.

You can Also Check out: One Sided Effort Relationship Quotes

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