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Famous Old Gregg Quotes

Old Gregg is a character from the BBC sketch show, The Mighty Boosh. He is a bizarre, green-skinned creature with gills, a fish-like tail, and webbed hands and feet. Old Gregg is known for his outrageous quotes, which are often sexual.

This article contains some of my favorite Old Gregg Quotes that are interesting. Carefully read through!

Old Gregg Quotes

“I’ve got this. This is good.” – Old Gregg

“Do you like Old Gregg’s place? I’ve got all things that are good.” – Old Gregg

“We could do some watercolors together, you and I.” – Old Gregg

“Don’t lie to me, boy.” – Old Gregg

“I know what you’re thinking, ‘Here comes Old Gregg. He’s a scaly man-fish.’ You don’t know me. You don’t know what I got. I got something to show you. You know what that is? That’s Old Gregg’s vgn*. I’ve got a mangina! I’m Old Gregg!” – Old Gregg

“Come on, don’t make me beg now, ‘cause I’m not your regular guy! Don’t be shy! Do you love me?” – Old Gregg

“Why are you going? We got everything we need here. We got Bailey’s cream. And everything we need. I’ll get you another Bailey’s.” – Old Gregg

“Wanna come to a club where people wee on each other?” – Old Gregg

“I’m Old Gregg. Pleased to meet you.” – Old Gregg

“Easy now, fuzzy little man-peach, hmm? You ever drunk Bailey’s from a shoe?” – Old Gregg

“Thank you, sir. I got some more. I got these too. That one’s Bailey’s a bit bigger. And that one’s as close as you can get to Bailey’s without your eyes getting wet.” – Old Gregg

“It’s attached to your rod, mother licker!” – Old Gregg

“Maybe I should ask you the same question—what you doing in my waters?” – Old Gregg

“Gregg’s place. You’ve been asleep. Do you want a little drinky? I’ll get you a drink. You like Bailey’s? Mmmm—creamy. Soft, creamy beige.” – Old Gregg

It’s about the size of a medicine ball, but covered in t*ts. ~ Old Gregg.

Do you like Old Gregg’s place? I’ve got all things that are good. ~ Old Gregg.

Old friends pass away, and new friends appear. It is just like the days. An old day passes, and a new day arrives. The important thing is to make it meaningful: a meaningful friend – or a meaningful day.

Dalai Lama 

A birthday is just another day where you go to work and people give you love. Age is just a state of mind, and you are as old as you think you are. You have to count your blessings and be happy.

Do you love me? Are you playin’ your love games with me? I just want to know what to do, because I need your love a lot. Oh, come on now.

~ Old Gregg.

Let me show you something. I call that one Old Gregg. And then that one I call Old Gregg. And this one, you know what I call that one?

~ Old Gregg.

Maybe i should ask you the same question, whatcha doin in my waters?

~ Old Gregg.

Could you learn to love me?

What did it mean to you to see that? Did it mean you love me?

You love me, and you’ve seen me, and you know me. I’m Old Gregg!

You must love me exactly as I love you.


Old Gregg quotes are a hilarious and clever way to make a point. They can be used in everyday conversation to make people laugh or to get your point across uniquely. Next time you need to make a point or want to share a funny story, try using an Old Gregg quote!

SEE ALSO: Quotes About Sparks

You can Also Check out: Foot Tattoo Quotes


I’m Queen Ojukwu, a professional SEO content writer at Silicon Africa Technologies. I'm also an on-page SEO technical expert with over 4 years of experience.

I'm a fan of technology, reading, and writing, and also interested in web development. You can hit me up for business by clicking any of my social media handles.

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