Beavis and Butthead are two of the most iconic characters in MTV’s ’90s classic series “The Simpsons.” Although they haven’t been on the air in over a decade, their influence lives on through quotes that have been used both in real life and online.
In this article, we have made a list of Beavis and Butthead quotes that will make you laugh out loud.
Beavis And Butthead Quotes
“Shut up Butthead, we’re never gonna score, everyone here has probably scored. This old lady probably scores” -Beavis in Beavis and Butthead The Movie- Tour Bus Scene.
“Thank you oh great master for your wisdom, but we were wondering if you could, like, bite us.”-Butt-Head, to the homeless man whom he believes to be a werewolf.
I don’t know what you’re thinking, but I simply cannot have students roaming the halls, disrupting other classes, and giving prophecies of a great plague! – Principal McVicker.
“Y’know, like, this band sucks. But it’s like, they suck like, in new ways, y’know. Like, they suck in ways we haven’t, like, seen stuff suck before,” Butt-head.
“Everybody thinks babies are cute. Well they’re not so cute when they are yours, I’ll tell you that right now! Crapping and puking all over you! They cost a damn fortune to feed and all they do is make your life a misery, just like what you’re doing to your parents right now!” Coach Buzzcut.
“Why don’t you try this experiment? Analyze the friction caused by digitally oscillating your wiener!” Daria Morgendorffer.
“And when this “magic bullet” went into the President’s chest, it had to make a sharp turn in order to exit his body from the neck. Then it would have had to turn right, then left, and somehow have enough energy to hit the Governor in the front seat. Clearly, the assassination was a conspiracy,” Daria.
“Man I tell what, I felt like a one-legged cat try’ in to burry turd’s on a frozen pond out there,”- Tom.
“Yeah I know they’re medical marvels and all, but I really don’t want to change their catheters again.”-a nurse tending to a comatose Beavis and Butt-Head.
“Thank you oh great master for your wisdom, but we were wondering if you could, like, bite us.”-Butt-Head, to the homeless man whom he believes to be a werewolf.
“Hey Butt-head, I dreamed I was at school last night. Do you think that counts for attendance?”- Beavis.
“My list includes any girl with at least one boob” Butthead “My list is like your list, but it also includes your MOM” –Beavis.
“If you love something, and you set it free, and it doesn’t come back, you’re a dumbass.” –Butthead.
“We’re never gonna score! We’ll get cars and like, we’ll get jobs, and we’ll have to like, mow lawns and scrub the grill, but we’re never gonna score ever! It’s gonna suck!” Beavis.
“Mr. O’Brien: Alright, now I’m gonna ask you some questions. Failure to be truthful, and your responses will be interpreted as an acknowledgment of guilt. Do you understand?
“Agent Hurley, I want you to give this scumbag a cavity search! I’m talking Roto-Rooter! Don’t stop until you reach the back of his teeth!” Agent flaming.
“And what about your patent disregard for Beavis! Do you not care a rat’s ass for the safety of your closest companion!?” Buzzcut.
Beavis, you’re gonna keep talking about loogies, and I’m gonna be too busy swinging around my gigantic schlong. – Butthead
“How come there aren’t any, like, women in his lair?” “They’re probably out doing his bidding.” -Beavis and Butt-Head discussing a homeless man, whom they believe to be a werewolf.
“Shut up Beavis before I kick your ass so hard it’ll turn inside-out and come out your mouth.”-Butthead
Conclusion
Beavis and Butthead quotes are hilarious and timeless. They never seem to get old, no matter how many times you hear them.
If you’re looking for a good laugh, then be sure to check out some of these classic lines from the dynamic duo. And don’t forget to share them with your friends!
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